


Annoyance of Hunts-Man

by ArisenFromNightmares



Category: RWBY
Genre: Gen
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-07-08
Updated: 2018-07-08
Packaged: 2019-06-07 02:21:14
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 958
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/15208715
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/ArisenFromNightmares/pseuds/ArisenFromNightmares
Summary: Giving Jaune a Sailor Moon-esque transformation sequence pissed me off





	Annoyance of Hunts-Man

I’ve seen a lot of crap during my time in Vale: Dust robberies that were foiled by a Little Red Riding Hood looking little girl, the Grimm rampaging through the streets while people were running like scared little bitches.

Hey; I may be a homeless bum living out of a cardboard box, but I’m still a Beacon Academy graduate dammit! So me and my twin swords did what little we could to assist the newbies until backup arrived and well..you know the rest.

But since then, things were relatively quiet on the street corners.

Except when it comes to the night time, that’s when I get really annoyed. Not because of the lack of sleep, the activities of other people doing whatever it is they do, no, my problems stem from the antics of that little shit known as the “Hunts Man”.

No, you didn’t misread that. There really is somebody out there, doing what they can to foil “Crime”. Normally I’d let this crap slide and try my best to sleep through the night, but goddamn this idiot and his stupidly bright signal!

Nights without sleep tend to eat away at the psyche, which was already frail thanks to my schizophrenic partner dooming my career before it even started thanks to him putting an ice bullet into some poor civilian’s foot while on a routine extermination mission.

But the day was my Nirvana: the noise of the people, the smells of the nearby food carts selling the stuff that makes my stomach grumble, and like always the opportunity to score pity Lien from people walking the streets.

“Spare some change ma’am?” I waved my pity cup as a tall, beautiful, pale-haired woman sauntered by, I could tell by her stance that she was no “Lady of the Night.” Although she would definitely make bank as one, but right now I could just use the Lien for a hot dog. “Help a broken Huntsman out miss?” She would look me up and down, I was used to this response. After all, who would believe a bum like me was a Huntsman?

“Hmph, there are services that help people in your situation.” The woman would sigh and slip something in my cup, it was too slim to be Lien and she certainly wasn’t the type to toss in trash just to spite me. “When you’re ready to stop being foolish, there’s a number you should call.” The woman would walk off toward the ice cream parlor, not a bad idea on a day like this.

“Help! Someone help me!” I searched my surroundings carefully, seeing nothing out of the ordinary at first but nobody would be stupid enough to fake a plea for help. “Someone help, please!” This time I actually stood up and peeked around the corner, lo and behold some blonde-haired kid and an admittedly adorable corgi where slowly making some sort of a costume change, although it was slow, painful, and an insult to magical girl sequences.

“Seriously, I need help!”’ The plea for help was starting to annoy me now, but I couldn’t just ditch my panhandling corner to handle what could be nothing. Could I? “For the love of Oum, somebody!

Alright, fuck it. Plenty of time for more panhandling later in the day. Rushing toward the source of the screams, I find some poor schlub surrounded by black suited goons in a good ol’ fashioned shakedown.

“Gentleman, I’m afraid I’m gonna have to ask you to knock it off.” I would draw my weapons and ready my trusty hook swords, Dextera and Sinestra were my precious ladies and they were ready for action. “Besides, if I have to hear this little pussy scream for help again..there will be blood.”

The poor guy who was being shaken down would look at me incredulously like I insulted his mother, and two of the goons were quick to advance on me while drawing their weapons. Nothing I couldn’t handle, as they reached to swing a fist I would smack it aside with the flat of one blade before tripping him up with the other. “Come on guys just give it a rest.” I stepped back as the second goon swung and gave him a little nick on the cheek, licking my lips as the blood flowed. “You really wanna tell your boss how you got beat by a hobo?” The other suits would draw their weapons, intent on not stepping forward like their associates had.

“Stop right there!” I sighed in relief and sheathed the ladies before stepping into the reflection of the store window, my Semblance is a tricky one: I can travel through anything that casts a reflection. It’s a handy little escape method in certain scenarios, but it’s kinda hard to find reflective surfaces when you’re hunting Grimm out in the fields.

“Somebody here need help?” I stopped to see that annoying Hunts Man on the other side of the store window I was walking through: So determined, so eager to save the day.

I really hate that level of naivete.

Traveling a little further down brought me closer to a store near a lumber yard, seeing a stack of two by fours gave me a very stupid idea. Stepping out of the glass and making a break for the lumber yard, I hid behind the stack of wood for a bit before grabbing a piece and slowly making my way towards a disappointed Hunts-Man.

 ***WHACK!!!*** Seeing the kid go down like a sack of potatoes made me feel just a slight bit better, at least until I saw the look of fury in the Corgi’s eyes and decided to run for the hills.

Man’s best friend makes a powerful enemy.

**Author's Note:**

> Giving Jaune a Sailor Moon-esque transformation sequence pissed me off


End file.
